


Curious

by elar3716



Category: None - Fandom
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-11-20
Updated: 2020-12-02
Packaged: 2021-03-09 21:01:49
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 3
Words: 1,574
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27642494
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/elar3716/pseuds/elar3716
Summary: Only if you want to read about my thoughts and maybe stuff about me.But if you don't, that's okay too.Thank you.
Comments: 4
Kudos: 4





	1. Chapter 1

Hey, there. 

I wanted to let people know that this is here, and it will probably be updated whenever, just like A Different World Than the Last. Speaking of my very first fanfiction... 

I miss it. 

I miss it so much. 

I don't think giving an excuse is right at all. All I can write is that I'm sorry to those who commented on my work. I'm sorry that I didn't post regularly. I'm sorry that I didn't post like I wrote that I would. I know that it's not that big of a deal for some people, but I just wanted to let everyone know I'm sorry. 

And I have read that one comment who said not to apologize as much. It's just a habit of mine, unfortunately. Every time someone accidentally steps on my shoes, I'm the one who apologizes. It's a little funny. Well, I guess not. Let me know if you feel like commenting. Or even if you've read this far. 

And don't worry. I'll write again. 

Now, back to the point of this new work. I made this so that I can write down what I'm feeling and send it out somewhere. Somewhere people can read it, even if none do. I just thought it would help since this semester or this year has been so exhausting. 

I started college. 

I can't say I like it. 

It's online, first of all. I thought it wouldn't be much different from how I ended highschool, online classes, and stuff. But no. It's asynchronous classes. No zoom meetings or calls. Just a textbook and assignments to do. 

Even so, I can't complain. It's the way things have to be. 

I live in Japan.

I love it. 

I've lived here for about two and a half years. It was the very first place that I was moving to in my entire life. I never moved before, so when I found out I was moving to Japan, I was so, so happy. I still am. But, of course, I didn't think about the year after I'd graduate high school. Too high on the fact that I was _in Japan._

I will miss it so much. 

If you want to know more about it, just let me know. 

But, back to college. It's not that I have a problem with all my classes. It's just math and business class that make me die inside sometimes. _Those_ are the classes that need extra attention. Or, really anyone who can teach it to me. In school, you're taught a curriculum, mostly based on a textbook. The teachers, being teachers, teach it to you. You get second chances in school. It's free. 

College isn't like that. 

I knew that too. 

But it never ceases to amaze me how fucking afraid I am of failing. 

Have you ever felt that way? Afraid of failure? You don't have to answer if you don't want to. Also, I'm sorry if this is putting a damper on your day. I know that the last thing people need right now is another negative person. I'm trying not to be. I don't want to be. 

I guess it's the stress. 

Either way, I should be working now. But the time difference messes with my sleep cycle. I guess I'll sleep then. 

Thank you if you've read this far. Thank you if you commented, and hopefully, it makes you feel better somehow. Thank you if you even reached this work. Even though this was kind of negative in the end, I still am more okay than before. 

Have a nice day, or evening, or night wherever you are, whoever you are.


	2. I have no clue.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Basically, the chapter title is enough to summarize.

Hello, again. 

Today was the same as the last. I wake up, get ready (even though I'm not going out), sit at my desk, work, panic, work, panic again, reach out for help, wait for it while working, talk to help, help leaves, overcome myself with dread, aaaaaaand watch another episode of my favorite show. Now, we're here. 

I know that I probably should be going out more, and I'm not saying going out as in "go-out-to-crowds" go out. I mean, just taking a walk. In Japan, I find that there's always a different path you can take. The real question is, is seeing if it's difficult or hard to walk on. Either way, I'd be okay with it. Once, I climbed up these stairs that went on  _ forever.  _ It may not have been forever, but it certainly felt like it. But I reached the top, and all I could see was the city below. So breathtaking. But then again, most places are here, in my opinion. 

I wasn't that shocked coming here. But I think it's because I had to take a class before settling in. I live near a military base, and some people had to try to get you prepared for whatever you may encounter in Japan. They talked about the basic stuff, like train etiquette. Which I didn't know that was a thing. I thought you just stood there and waited for your stop, and you technically do. I think they just made it more complicated. 

And yes. The trains are astounding. 

You could pretty much go anywhere as long as you have a specific card that has money on it. You can always reload it on there at a machine located at a train station. If you ever need to go somewhere, and you live in an urban or suburban area, then you're likely to be near a train station. 

The only problems with the trains are that when I get closer and closer to Yokohama, the train's cars  _ fill  _ with people. I'm talking,  _ sardine-packed _ in a can filled. I mean, it's to be expected (you're going into the city after all), but sometimes there's not enough room. 

But as soon as everyone gets off at Yokohama, there's a whole new bunch, headed to Tokyo or Shinagawa, I'd guess. And God forbid you to want to get to the  _ airport.  _ I remember having to physically yank my suitcase off the train through a tightly packed train car. I tried saying, excuse me, but they could only shuffle and squeeze so much. 

But aside from that, trains are cool. Especially if you want to ride them and get away, see something new. 

OH. 

And I can happily say that I've been to a penis festival. 

Yeah.  _ A penis festival. _

That was a trip. Once we got there, there were a bunch of little sculptures and clay makings of vaginas and phalluses. And I could never forget the lollipop penises. 

But what was the best part was this giant, glorious looking phallus, carried through the crowd with celebrating people dressed as penises all around. 

_ Anyway.  _

What a great way to end this post. With a pleasant penis festival reverie. 

If you want to know more, I guess let me know?

I hope you have a good day, or night, or evening wherever you are, whoever you are. 


	3. I'm lost, but I will try and write again.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Basically the same as the last two chapters. Talking about nothing in particular.

Hello. 

I'm thinking of writing again, finally. The end of the semester is coming up, and I know I should be studying or finishing up assignments, but in all honesty - I don't care today. I miss A Different World Than the Last, and I can't even find where I left off on my computer because it is  _ buried _ under the amount of work I had to do this semester. 

But I will find it. 

And I will continue. 

At least for today. Hopefully forever until it's finished. 

I think writing like this is healthy. I'm not saying that because I'm a doctor or anything, I'm only writing that because it genuinely makes me forget about what I have to do. That probably sounds bad. But it's okay for me. I have anxiety, and usually, I can handle it. But this semester  _ made  _ me question that. Or, to be particular, this whole  _ year  _ made me question my capabilities of being completely calm and content with my life.

Either way, I'm only taking two classes next semester. Not because I want to - well. That's not true. I  _ do want to.  _ I think that it would be best, especially since I'd be moving again. To where? I have no clue. 

Even so, today is the day that I'll try not to freak out for the next three exams I have to study for and eventually take, not having a clue of what's on them, like usual. But I have A Different World Than the Last. 

People who comment and say what they like about it, and honestly... 

That is the best feeling in the world. 

I know I'm probably going too much into it. But I genuinely love it when people tell me what I'm doing right. And I'll still love comments if they tell me what I could do better or improve on because it's all the same to me. And what I mean is, is that someone took the time to type out what they thought of something that I enjoyed making. That's amazing to me. 

Am I too much? I probably am, but I keep thinking that they didn't have to do that. They didn't even have to press the kudos button. But they did. 

That's why I want to start again. That's why I want to make another chapter. When I can, of course, but I want to go back. 

I'll try it.


End file.
